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Epicurean Accomplishments
Gallivanting downtown on a Saturday night
Anyone could have sworn: this throng is an outpour of Maenads!
We were drinking like fish
We'd been smoking like chimneys
Then cut up lots o' rug
While tripping on ecstasy
House beats were hitting hard against our SURFACE
When all of us flowed as Shiva Nataraja promised
Because time isn't money - time's verve in motion
Oh and by the way, rain indoors, qualifies as miraculous
So just relax, keep it simple
Be aloof but stay humble
Lose self within action
To recall what's eternal
For those who breathe every moment
Shall surely traverse the immense breadth of infinity
Before anyone else can even
Complete the blink of an eye!
2 Bold Responses
Cool!
Ha! Your best of the libertine series.
I think you should still cut 'promised' out of stanza 3, line 2; so it reads: "When all of us flowed as Shiva Nataraja" to keep the rhythm. Ellipsis does the job for you.
I think these would be more powerful if you arranged them all in a series: like an argument. You could edit them until they're a handful of razor blades.
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